Sitting at a table in the midst of crowd, alone; its a different feeling. Watching people you know walk by, busy in conversations, lost in thoughts, indifferent to you, not out of spite but out of ignorance. They can’t see your pain through your half smile. You nod, a jester meant to convey you feel fine there alone, but you lie. They think you’re fine. But they just don’t know…
They don’t know your pain…
or the guilt you carry from past mistakes
or the weight of finances and responsibility
or the broken relationships you can’t fix
or the shame of not living up to expectations.
Sitting alone in a crowded room. It happens all to frequently. Even to those who follow Christ. Though we may walk in the light, sometimes it feels more like twilight with shades of grey. And this heaps only more guilt on the lonely, because everything is supposed to be happy and joyful right? When you love Jesus everything should be wonderful correct?
Its so easy to just say in those cases that “Jesus loves you” and “God knows what you are going through.” Yet those words seem so trite. They don’t REALLY help. I mean the whole point of loneliness lies in the fact that others cannot readily identify with you.
Yet the beauty of Jesus lies deeper that the simple “Jesus loves you.”, a reality which penetrates deeper than a catchphrase on a bumper sticker. And the reality is this… Jesus loves you enough to go to the cross and in doing so dealt with your guilt that burdens you; bore your shame which causes you to sink farther away from your community, recognized the huge expectations on you and gave you new, easier ones; and took all of your loneliness upon Himself. From the Last Supper to the Cross, Jesus knew the meaning of being alone in a crowded place. His love for us burdened Him with all of our cares, which led Him down a pretty lonely path. Why? Because He loves you and me… He suffered even God turning away from Him because of our sin on Him, all because He loves you.
Jesus identifies with your loneliness, for whatever reason you are lonely. He dealt with sin, He contended with expectations and stress, and He had friends who only concerned themselves with their own needs. Jesus knows loneliness.
You are not alone.
“Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” – Hebrews 13:5b NIV